Monday, February 2, 2009

Speaking of Wal-Mart...

Good luck is difficult to come by in my family. You can even ask my mother-in-law...she has said several times that if we didn't have bad luck...we wouldn't have any luck at all. However, once in awhile I must do something worthy of good karma...and it just so happened some came our way by means of a Wal-Mart gift card.

My friend's husband's company was looking for married women with kids, who's household income was around a specified amount, who were planning on throwing a Super Bowl party. Such individuals would receive a $100 gift card for Wal-Mart and a disposable camera...their mission: to throw a party (using the gift card to buy food and supplies,) take pictures, and then answer some questions about their shopping experience. Suh-weet! I'll throw a party for that! Of course, that meant that I would have to find out what teams were playing this year...

So, because we got the chance to spend money that wasn't ours....Bruce insisted on going. Which meant that we were going to Wal-Mart, on a major shopping trip...with five kids. It didn't start off too bad...we grabbed three carts to accomodate all of the kids and groceries, and set off. Perhaps the day before the Super Bowl was not the best day to bring five kids out. The store was packed. Marissa wanted to take pictures of everything. Jaylond was very particular about brand choice (and color....apparently the orange bag of Better Made barbeque chips is much better than the black bag.) Irelynn wanted to help with everything. She insisted that our party needed bananas. Connor decided he did not want to stay in his infant seat, so I resorted to carrying him around almost the entire time. We had to feed the boys in the middle of the chip aisle. Bruce was being extremely indecisive about the beer: we had "free" money to spend...should we buy the really good stuff we wouldn't normally get, or just buy the cheap stuff in mass quantities? We finally got through the check-out, only to run into one of Bruce's aunts that confirmed for us that we are, indeed, certifiable. You know...just in case we didn't know.

When we got home I realized that Irelynn must have helped more than I realized, because somehow we ended up buying some weird lunchmeat with cheese embedded in it.

Ok. Next step: invite people over. Because our lives consist of eating, pooping, and taking care of kids (oh...and I guess going to work for Bruce)...we have no friends. Not really. So...we invited our siblings over. And their friends.

Everyone seemed to have a good time. My sister prepped me on who was playing, so I could be an informed hostess. I didn't feel too bad...she had to look it up online.

Irelynn was delighted to have so many people here to entertain her. She brought out her baby dolls and bottles and insisted that everyone feed her babies for her. Then she left the living room, to come back out with no shirt on, and a different one in her hand. I asked her why she took her shirt off....her answer? Her baby spit up on her and she had to change.

This is what party life is like when you have kids. Instead of being the funny drunk person with the lampshade on your head, you are the person with the nekkid toddler who covers you in smiley face stickers and tells you to change the channel to "The Backyardigans."

The best news of all, though...we now have plenty of leftover beer and sandwich makings. And the next time my mother-in-law tells me we only have bad luck, I can remind her of the time I got free beer. And a side of chaos.

I only have one question, though...when did Omar Epps decide to coach the Steelers?


  1. That is so funny about the spit-up on her shirt!!! : )

  2. Yes...she is very serious when it comes to taking care of her babies. She needs burp cloths, puts them in the swings, talks to them like I talk to Connor and's pretty funny.

  3. Teresa cuddles her baby a little and then throws her up in the air and laughs when she lands with a thud. She'd probably do the same to Simon if he didn't freak out as soon as she gets her grubby little hands around his neck and "hugs" him. I guess she loves him...just in a very aggressive way...