Saturday, May 8, 2010

What's My Age Again?

I'm beginning to wonder if there is a certain age in which parents become outdated.  Is it the age of the parent, or the age of the child?  You know that age...it is when suddenly a parent goes from knowing everything...to not having a clue.  Oddly enough, this onset of irrelevence and antiquity is not permanent.  It does not get worse through the years.  In fact, in the beginning stages one can be rest assured that the symptoms will only last about 10-12 years.  Just as they hit their peak....they start to disappear.  I remember this with my own parents.  Once I hit about 20-years-old, their minds sharpened...they even became...wise.  Unfortunately...that means I still have at least ten years to go with my own kids.  Twenty, if you count the process starting over again with the younger ones.

Interestingly, my symptoms vary between interactions with different children.  I notice my 14-year-old son and I enjoy the same music...so he still excitedly lets me know that Weezer will be performing at Bayfest this year.  He also discusses other topics of interest in the media, and informs me of current books of interest he feels I should check out.  Either neither of us has hit this age quite yet...or he spares my feelings by not telling me how outdated I really am.  He does like to argue the logic of why 14-years of age is actually appropriate for learning to drive...but I have yet to get the eye roll and the "you just don't understand!"

However...to my 12-year-old daughter...I am practically a dinosaur.  In fact, I think that's about all she sees AND hears during our conversations.  "RAWR, RAWR RAWR...roar roar.  Now."  I don't know who Justin Bieber is...and I don't know why Taylor Swift and that Jonas guy broke up.  I don't understand fashion...like why someone would tie a knot in the back of her tee-shirt, making it look like she has a stubby tail.  And my thoughts on hair and make-up are soooo 2006. 

Luckily my 4-year-old still thinks I'm the smartest person in the world.  She still copies everything I do.  And my youngest boys?  Well...they think I'm a dinosaur, too.  However, that is because I wave my stubby little arms at them and chase them shouting "RAWR!"...to which, instead of rolling eyes, they laugh hysterically and say "RAWR" back. 

I suppose being clueless can have it's advantages.  It prevents me from having to actually watch the latest Disney Channel made-for-TV movie...because, you know...I'm too old to "get it," anyway.  I also do not have to pretend to like Lady Gaga. 

I suppose it could be worse...I could be like my husband and be stuck in the '80's.  I might be clueless...but I have yet to embarrass the children by singing bad songs in falsetto...in public.   This is the only time our daughter prefers to be seen with me.

Unfortunately, the problem with having so many children is that by the time I'm old enough to have become intelligent in my children's eyes once again...I'll be old enough to start going senile.  Man...I just can't win, can I?  Better go YouTube Justin Bieber...

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