Connor's First Haircut

I had not intended on cutting my baby's hair yet. It began with taking the children out to get haircuts for the start of school. I ventured out to the local Fantastic Sam's with all five children in tow...and, as always, it turned into a bit of an adventure.

I put the babies in the monstrosity of a stroller, Irelynn at my heels, and the older kids walking at enough of a distance that it could be questioned whether or not they belonged to me. I'm finding as they get older, that distance seems to grow ever so slightly. It could be because I am no longer cool, in my formula stained oversized tee-shirt. It could be that I say words like "Yay," "Poo-poo," and "Binky." Or it could be because I am pushing a monster stroller that is packed with enough supplies to survive a week in the wilderness.

As we enter, people stare. I sign the kids up, and Jay is the first to go. The stylist is trying to convince him to go a bit shorter, as he was beginning to look as though he had a mullet. He agreed that a mullet was not cool, and let her go to work, without going too short, of course...because clean-cut is also not cool.

Irelynn repeatedly asked if it was her turn. She is the only toddler I know who absolutely loves to get haircuts. She asks once a week or so to get another one. It was finally her turn, and I ask Jay to help entertain the babies so that I can be next to her. Jay took the term "entertain" quite seriously, and the next thing I know Comedy Hour has started up in the waiting area, complete with the twins laughing and applauding. People begin to smile and giggle. It can only last for so long, though, before something happens.

"Uh, Mom...we have an emergency over here!"

I look over to Jay, who is holding Connor.

"What?"

"Connor took his pants off!!"

Sure enough, there was my smiling baby boy, pantless. I go to help put them back on, which, if anyone has a one-year-old might know...is not an easy feat. Connor was determined to only be in his diaper and shirt, and put up a good struggle. We finally got them on, and Irelynn's haircut was finished. And she had to go potty. Now.

I look pleadingly at Jay and ask if would mind watching the twins for a couple minutes so I could run her into the bathroom. The older girl was busy getting her hair done. Jay let out a sigh that said "do I have a choice?"

We made it to the restroom just in time.

We came out just in time to find out that Owen apparently had to go, too. Jaylond informed me that he stank...big time. And he was cranky.

Finally the older girl's hair was done...it took awhile because not only did they cut it, but took the time to flip it, mouse it, spray it and scrunch it. It was certainly flippy. And had alot of volume. And would look nothing like that the minute she washed it. I did a mental cringe and hoped she realized that.

Then, I had a mental lapse. The thought was that, I was here anyway...it would be awhile before I came again...and I didn't want to try it on my own. I looked down at my shaggy-haired baby and asked the lady if she had time to do one more. I sat him on my lap, Irelynn kept his attention, and curls began to fall. I began to get worried...but upon my request, she left the curls in the back. At the risk of giving him an uncool mullet, I let her trim up the rest of his hair.

Then...the big moment came....the moment the kids all wait for (even still, as teens)...time to get the after haircut sucker. Alas...they were all out of suckers. I thought Irelynn might cry. But then, they came up with something better. A Hannah Montana poster. My toddler perked right up.

So, it ended well. When we got home, I put the babies down for a nap, and hung Hannah right under The Jonas Brothers poster on Irelynn's wall.

At least the kids' look good. All four of them. Well, five, because Owen has yet to grow enough hair to warrant cutting.